Saturday, May 28, 2011
Friday, May 27, 2011
The Laws of Distraction
Pets, parents and pampered babies. The key to control is to have something other than lint in one’s pocket. Whiny children in my experience are easy to misdirect. Whenever I board an elevator I inquire “who wants to press the buttons?” Invariably I get a taker and then, a quiet ride. Cats are pests, yet uncanny. They sit on the section of the New York Times calling my name. I whip out the catnip toy and throw it aloft. Joy.
Senior mothers-in-law have preoccupations. Tonight we set the table for a barbeque alfresco. At the last, possible, moment, she must walk Stinky around the block. “Knock yourself out” I say as I shimmy to the table in my sandals, cropped top and cocktail. Husband loosens the tie and bestows a kiss. Our dog luxuriates in the fading son.
Inside, the message machine bleeps in vain. After the sun fades we walk inside and hear it. “Son” she croaks on tape. We have no idea how long ago that plaintive cry was recorded. Husband puts on his belt and shoes, but then I hear the clang from Stinky’s collar. Jack is safe, but had encountered a homeless man and wanted us to bring him money.
We demurrer and bring her gently back into the fold. I had lots in my pockets, but she says she can’t hear much. That I believe since I scream lots of my everyday dialogue. She has an estate. She can do what she wants.
Senior mothers-in-law have preoccupations. Tonight we set the table for a barbeque alfresco. At the last, possible, moment, she must walk Stinky around the block. “Knock yourself out” I say as I shimmy to the table in my sandals, cropped top and cocktail. Husband loosens the tie and bestows a kiss. Our dog luxuriates in the fading son.
Inside, the message machine bleeps in vain. After the sun fades we walk inside and hear it. “Son” she croaks on tape. We have no idea how long ago that plaintive cry was recorded. Husband puts on his belt and shoes, but then I hear the clang from Stinky’s collar. Jack is safe, but had encountered a homeless man and wanted us to bring him money.
We demurrer and bring her gently back into the fold. I had lots in my pockets, but she says she can’t hear much. That I believe since I scream lots of my everyday dialogue. She has an estate. She can do what she wants.
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